tHiNkiN' oUt LoUd

Oh Well... its 24th and I've got nothing to do.. but blog...been thinking alot about the Holidays in the Philippines. I miss my cousins and I wanna see Janis ( my niece from my cousin Pia). Other than that.. we've been struggling alot financially and I guess its part of my life now that is why I'm suddenly getting used to it.. but hey I want it to end though... I'm also thinking about my big brother's work issues. I hope everything works out fine with him in God's grace. It's the first time I guess that I won't give any gifts to my hubby.. but I've got one for my son hehehe... Its ok as long as we're spending it together. Initially planning to fly back to manila but thinking about it.. its double trouble for me.. first my leave is unpaid ( ive consumed all my vacation leave) then I've gotta swipe it with my card.. which adds to my tons of credit card bill I've been wishing to be freed from. Anyways.. I know there's always a next

My Hubby went on training in Zurich last Oct 31st and he's arriving this Friday. I wish we could come but its purely business. I am sooo happy for him. I hope more of this oppurtunity comes. Thank God!

Yes!! Finally the Lord answered our prayers. My husband's gonna work for Lodestone. He'll start the training november of this year and they are aiming Zurich! It was really worth the wait. Thank you Lord. Wait for the Lord, His plans are always the best Thanks be to God!

Today we are expecting the final result of one of the most favored job interviews that my hubby will be having. We wanted this company for him, the schedule, the compensation, the work itself was definitely the job he was looking for. The whole package of the job this company is offering is everything he wanted. We've prayed hard for this compnay and we're still praying for God's grace and favor that it will be granted to him. God willing later this afternoon we will receive the good news from God. Today I've found out that I was not pregnant. It was mixed emotions, I am not ready yet but I am expecting... since I wanted another baby. Anyways in God's time I'll have a baby girl for sure. Thanks for all the blessings big and small, thanks for everything good and bad. In all things we should give thanks. Thank you Lord!

They tell me I'm addicted to drama, and I guess I do when I started watching one I just can't stop. I am totally addicted to Kdrama specifically. I love the stories and I guess watching dramas for me is the same as  reading books. I can imagine myself as one of the character, and being one makes me feel the way they feel. It's a dream in my reality.. that statement sounded like a song lyrics but it is true.. There are things that made me feel great when watching Kdrama... although I know its a form of hopelessness still even for a few episodes or hours I've watched it I would feel different and would feel good and loved. I am not saying I am not loved.. its just a different unique kind of feeling. I guess I'm just an addict.. or rather a hopeless romantic..

Just recently we've been having fun watching the Pinoy Pick up line battle by a filipino show "Bubble Gang". It's crazy and super funny although some lines have been mentioned in the movie "My amnesia girl" still it never fails to make me laugh. My top favorites: Boy: Ang Galing mo talaga... Girl: Baket Boy: Kasi di mo pa ako binabato tinamaan na ako sayo... Boy: Apoy ka ba Girl: hinde.. baket Boy: Kasi... "Alab you" Boy: Lambanog ka ba Girl:Baket Boy: Lakas ng tama mo Boy: Scientist ka ba? Girl: Baket? Boy: Lab kita eh Boy: Ikaw yung tipong di iniismall Girl: Talaga Boy: Ikaw yung tipong iniiBig  Boy:  Di tayo many Girl: baket? Boy: Dahil Match tayo yun lang

I am so happy because my favorite make up artist of all time Jung Saemool ( korean) confirmed me as Friend. I didn't expect it since her profile is very very limited. She just recently launch her own Makeup Brand MULE and I can't wait to get one no matter how expensive it will be! hahahaha.. She's a very artistic makeup artist that enahnces what you have and doesn't over do the make up and that is what I like about her.. I am happy she even commented on my post!! Thanks Jung Saem Mool!! Here are a few photo transformation she did with her talented hand.. She's my inspiration to do well with my craft for make up artistry.. Less is More.. Visit her website and see more photos www.jungsamemool.com  ALL THE BEST SAEMOOL-Unni!

Am I that bad? Do you not see any good qualities in me even a little bit? I hate being me because I know that you and other people hate me too! I know I am not perfect, but so does everyone else.. If you cannot handle me at my worst.. you don't deserve me at my best..

Last Sunday I got really pissed, with me and my migraine and my lil' boy throwing tantrums.. my string of patience broke down again... it always does that is why I always pray for more patience and I guess God gives me a handful situation that would normally piss me off to test my patience. Out of 10 test I guess I passed once or twice.. yeah! I know! Anyways, I lost my patience and had thrown my tatrums too! hahahah! We went back home, I was supposed to go with my hubby to that toy conference thingy but I was pissed so I stayed home. Then cook, then went out on my own. Because I was sooo pissed I bought a pair of clothes.. I know.. we're broke and struggling financially.. I don't know what's gotten into me.. I just realize I didt something weird when I was already looking at the credit card slip and receipt. Anyways I failed another nerve-wrecking test of patience. I hope God would grant my husband work soon!

Last night me and my hubby suddenly realized that we're reaching the end of the string... I was happy earlier that day because my UD 15th anniversary palette is already delivered. I ordered that not knowing, my hubby would lose his bread and butter. Anyways, then we realize that 15th is the day we need to pay our monthly rental for our room, and the school fees for corbin and my loan and a whole lot more. It's kinda getting into our system that we need to worry.. worry.. that's one thing I often do that I tried to remove from my way of living. I am learning to entrust everything to God. But when these bills keeps coming right at your face, its a struggle not to think about it and to worry about tomorrow. Good thing we were able to divert our worried faces to the funny storry we are watching.. it's the korean drama Secret Garden that I think I've watched it 3 times already. I am happy watching it with my hubby who never really liked watching korean drama or any sorts

I never believed in things that are so absurd and close to impossibility. I didn't realize that I should. Because God can do all things not possible with men. I tried it and was overwhelmed with His amazing power. I hope the Lord continues to bless and show us the path He chose for our family and for my hubby. Thank you Lord for your never ending love and protections. Although I'm not perfect, and I throw tantrums at You before, yet You never failed to love me, it never changes the fact that You with all your Glory loved someone like me. Thanks for Your "saving grace" I will forever be free from bondage because of you! Thanks you so much and I hope I can give more love that You truly deserves.

Pressed down.. I was browsing over my tumblr account and saw this cute bean bag that looks like a tired cat, lying on the floor, looking tired and weak. I suddenly realize I was feeling that way too. I think not just me but me and my hubby. We're kinda pressed down with a big solid rock weighing us down, and we keep struggling to get up but because the rock is to heavy we're pressed down on the ground.  We've been struggling.. for years and years now... financially. There are times that seems to be ok.. but most of the time its not. Since the day I gave birth to my son, up to now, it seems like a never ending struggle for us. At times it is bearable but there are times its too heavy. I am still thankful that the Lord is there to give us strength. Right now, another problem hits us. I do not know what the Lord wants us to learn from these situation but still we have to accept it no matter what. We just have to be thankful that it is just money and not health or anything more

My Coastal scents order arrived yesterday and was super happy to receive. They packed it so securedly with all those bubble wrap and it was sent in a box from fedex it took 5 days from Florida to Singapore.. not bad.. I'm super happy with my new 88 shimmer/original shadow palette and their eclipse concealer plus 32 lip palette. I can say im new to this makeup thingy.. (late bloomer.. duh) yes I start to have interest in it way back 2006 thinking i can make it as a sideline when I go to Canada... but then again I didnt make it there.. Financially I was not prepared to get all these make up high end brand that I wanted. I only have drugstore cosmetics and a few highend brand such as bobbi brown and mac. I did a makeup from one of my friends and they love it. I didnt realize i am that artistic. So now Im fulfilling my dreams.. its never too late for a 31 year old to dream i guess? hehehe Ciao!

Ever been to...: Trivia : "Erik Weihenmayer (born September 23, 1968) is the first blind person to reach the summit of Mount Everest, on May 25, 2001. He also complet..."

This sunday is mother's day. It's supposed to be a happy occasion that we normally celebrate.  But in  relation to my previous post, you would all know I am with a heavy heart, I mean "we are"(our family). We are facing one of the toughest trials we've encountered as a  family.  Our "Mama'leng" is currently in pain and suffering from illness that we never thought would be this critical. She's turning 80 this August. The last time I remembered talking to her that we should celebrate her 80th and we (grandchildren abroad) should come home so that we can have a reunion. I hope the Lord permits.  I grew up in a very "close-family" environment. We know our family members I guess until the third degree or our moms and pops's 4th degree relatives. Regardless of where my grandma and grandpa lives (when he was still alive) we never fail to visit them. Mama'y leng or Mi'leng is what we call our grandmother. She loves to rant, and ta

My grandmother got sick, due to pneumonia. She went to her cardiologist for check up due to heavy labored breathing. She was advised to be brought to the hospital right away since it is an emergency case,she needs oxygen that time. My aunt was with her, since it has to be done ASAP she brought my grandmother to the public hospital (owned by the government ) Pasig City General Hospital.  When my mom told me about it, I suddenly panicked, since I have heard several bad feedback about the hospital. Even my cousins who are also abroad protested wanted her to be transferred immediately. Normally in the Philippines some public hospital are dreadful, because most of the time those patients brought to ICU never came out alive. However due to some circumstances, like paper works and the condition of our grandma, they've decided to stay. In the Philippines, public hospitals or government owned are scary, they lack facilities and other means to assist patients specially with severe conditio

I've been trying to finish reviewing my favorite scenes from the korean soap/drama I've watched so I can jot down my favorite quotes. I'm having a hard time since I don't have the dvds with me now, I only get a chance to view it again online... it's gonna be a long process though... Line up this are just some of them cause there's alot. Full house My name is Kim Sam Soon Coffee Prince - I guess not much You're Beautiful Baker King  My Princess Secret Garden - I have this on my page Oh what a long way to go... i don't think I can finish  soon enough. I can only watch then if I have spare time.

Boracay sea shore It's summer time in the Philippines already. I bet its really hot and windy during these days. Its been awhile since I've spent summer back home. Normally beach are the "in" thing during summer. Philippines is one of the best place to go beach hoppin'. One of the famous island to visit is Boracay. Holyweek and Summer time is the peak season for this place. Almost everyone enjoys coming up to Boracay to enjoy the summer heat and walk along the cool white sands along the shore. It's quite expensive if it's peak season and crowded as well but there are more fun activities than the lean or off peak season. Hope to get some tan and swim by the beach if my schedule and budget permits!

I've gotta getta hold of myself... i have to stop this korean drama syndrome.. i'm addicted and i need to stop it.. pathetic me...infatuated with a fictional character in a drama.. sheeeeesh.. this hafta stop and more sleep for me too... hahaha...

I've watch two korean drama writted by Kim Eun Suk, My Princess and Secret Garden. I love the story of both drama however Secret Garden got me hooked. I love the characters created by Kim Eun Suk specially the lead role of the man played by Hyun Bin. Kim Joo Won. He is from a wealthy family, smart and good looking and the CEO of Loel Mall. Gil Ra Im on the other hand is a poor stuntwoman. I love the time they switch soul its funny for HB to act like a girl. The story is quite unique.. a fantasy romance-drama and it shows from the end of the story that they are meant to see each other from the start because of Gil Ra Im's father. I love Kim Joo Won, eventhough he was just a fictional character I fell inlove with him and its because Hyun Bin portrays his role very well. The dialogues and the conversation would really melt any woman's heart. I would highly recommend this to be watch. I love this drama next to Full House. Great casting and script. Im sooo into this KJW

I've been watching korean drama I guess since 2002 hahaha. It started when I watch My Sassy girl movie (2001 )and I was really swept away by the uniqueness of their film. Prior to that I was hooked to one of taiwanese Drama Meteor garden, that started my journey to the Asian drama craziness hahaha. I started loving Korean drama when I've watch Stairway to Heaven and followed by full house. The cast and characters are really good in portraying their role. I love how the male lead roles are not afraid to express themselves in the drama (not sure if its true in real life though). My addiction is actually on-and-off type. Depends on my availability because we all know once you started watching, you'll continue till the break of dawn just to finish a 16 episodes (or more). I just recently watch "My Princess" and "Secret Garden" I love em. I love Secret Garden story better than My Princess though, ( but both of them are worth watching) I love the fantasy love

Yesterday, we've paid for the the school fees of Corbin. Its almost 2 thousand bucks. It has an advance deposit. We've decided to get a loan from Citibank again. We're actually in debt to alot of banks and person right now. Financially we're struggling.. our pockets doesn't just have holes in it.. but its totally broken. Money is important sure is.. but we have to invest with the development our son needs.. so we would still need to cope up and sacrifice alot. My dream is to clear out all those debts in God's perfect time.

I can't believe its the third month of the year. Time really flies. They say March is Women's month, I don't know why.. whatever it is its our month. I hope good vibes follows this month. We've been struggling for so long financially.. but still thank God that its just money matters.. which is less important than health matters.... with health everything is at stake, financial, emotional physical. God is still good.. I'm just impatient.. We have decided to enroll our child to the Kits4kids, a school who can assist him to develop and hopefully help him go to mainstream school soon. Its costly but I would say its the cheapest so far since its 5 times and 3hours a day unlike other schools 2 to 3 times a week and like 1 hour a day. We are quite excited about it but not about the bill. I want more patience, I am always tested and I always failed. I need an overflowing patience specially for Corbs.. Lord give me more..

This was the message from yesterday’s Worship service. Psalm 27:14. Waiting in Gods’ perfect time is really a struggle for me. Im an impatient type of person. I am always always praying for alotta patience and time and time again I’m always being tested. Test of patience is also a test of faith to H-I-M. Most often than not, I’m like a bratinella daughter who throws tantrums if my Father didn’t give me what I want at the right time I wanna have it. I know its wrong, but im also a Negastar.. and I hate it. Most of the time.. negative thoughts creeps into my mind if something not good happens. It’s being magnified in my mind threefolds. I guess the enemy is using it for me to doubt and fear him. Once I started this negative thoughts.. im trying to make ammends or remedy my situation which is not right, most ofte

I know how you are feeling right now, I don't wanna add up to how much realization and regrets you've been having lately. I believe the Lord made it happen for you to be able to learn alot of things, about decision making, about His will, about everything there is to learn. I know we've been given a blessing and have let go of it because of dwelling too much on emotions and frustrations. Comfort zone, that is something we have to step out of sometimes. It helps us grow and mature more. We've been asking God for so long for such request.. and at the right time it was given. But emotions gets through. If you're getting hurt doing what you want and what you've wished for, it could be a test of endurance, of how persistent you are to achieve your goal. A test how you can stretch out your knowledge because God knows your limitations and he knows your talents He knows what you CAN and CANNOT do. Anyways its the thing of the past... time to move on and enough of dwelli

People say that time will heal But you know, they just don't feel what you feel Times are hard but God is so good He's never failed you, and He said He never would He see's your tears He fights your fears CHORUS Hold on, help is on the way He said he'd never leave you or forsake you Stay strong Help is on the way He'd said he'd help you Just reach out and take his hand VERSE 2 He knows your heart, He lifts your head He's always close enough to hear every word you said When you're weak, He said He's so much more His arm is long enough to reach you where you are He see's your tears He fights your fears CHORUS 2x Help is on the way 10x

People say that time will heal But you know, they just don't feel what you feel Times are hard but God is so good He's never failed you, and He said He never would He see's your tears He fights your fears CHORUS Hold on, help is on the way He said he'd never leave you or forsake you Stay strong Help is on the way He'd said he'd help you Just reach out and take his hand VERSE 2 He knows your heart, He lifts your head He's always close enough to hear every word you said When you're weak, He said He's so much more His arm is long enough to reach you where you are He see's your tears He fights your fears CHORUS 2x Help is on the way 10x

This is not just a song.. i just hope it is as simple as that. My son has been assessed by a developmental Pediatrician last Saturday.. by Dra Maria Theresa Arranz Lim. She explained to us the urgency of the matter. While Corbin is still three and a half it would be best for him to undergo therapy. It consist of Occupational, Behavioral and Speech therapy. Its ok.. we can try our hard to do our best financially to get him the therapist he needs, the problem is that we need a slot. There is an available slot for a therapist but it is in the Philippines. Its sad because me and my hubby both work in SG and Corbs is always with us, we can't take it if he will go back home without us. I cannot resign because its gonna be a very expensive theraphy all the more I needed the money and at the same time my parents needs me to support them since they dont work. Plus we are paying monthly amortization for our unit. I don't want to think about it anymore... I just hope everything would be b

In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. 1:Thessalonians 5:18 --- its sooooo hard to do specially if you're down...I need strength Lord

Yesterday.. I've heard the news about former sec Angelo Reyes, shot himself. He was supposed to be questioned that day for the senate. For some reason he chicken out or he protected someone that he'd rather just die instead of name dropping a big person behind all this. He wants to protect his family perhaps but then again his family doesn't feel same without it.. it was some selfish reason.. I cannot judge him but all I know is it was wrong move... you cannot do anything in the afterlife... and he should have considered his two children with him... what a drag.. this issue keeps on getting complicated... Lord help the Philippines to recover.. please clean up the government and let right people.. God fearing people lead us...

I was happy that BFF Chris and my Hubby Jun enjoyed the "supposed to be" surprise party. It was because we were sharing FB that my hubby discovered. My BFF Chris is expecting a surprise but good thing they were not aware of what theme it would be... well at least for Chris. I've made an improvise photo booth out of icons ive collected from the net and printed it out on a while A3 paper only. It was a success since everyone loved it. They love the feel of posing for 3 cameras and feeling like a celebrity for just a day! Thank you Lord! Till the next event. Check my FB for photos.

Its the first time in my entire life i've experience this stressful coughing that even causes my migraine to attack. I've had this cough during the time my son is sick. I got it from him but mine is so dry it's painful in the chest when I cough then i tried my best to get the phlegm out but it dont work. I've tried the medicine given by the doctors, drank antibiotics, drank pei pa koa still didn't work. Now im trying this new medicine "Woods" I'm gonna wait and see if it works. It has been a week and a day that I've had this migraine-causing-stressful-dry-cough and I hope it gets better soon... I hate it...

Autism the PDD Autism is a neurological disorder that affects the development of a child's social, language and communication skills. A child with autism experiences significant developmental delays in areas such as speech and cognitive skills. He may not talk or talks less than other children the same age. He often does not understand verbal and nonverbal communication. He prefers to be alone and not socialize with parents or other children. He does not play "pretend" games like other children his age. Due to the developmental delays, autism is generally diagnosed before a child's third birthday. The Diagnostic Statistical Manual, Fourth Edition (DSM-IV), the standard classification system of American mental health professionals, categorizes autism as one of five pervasive development disorders (PDD). The five PDD disorders are autism, Asperger's Syndrome, Rett's Syndrome, childhood disintegrative disorder and pervasive development disorder-not otherwise

I thought everything was ok. I was so happy that for the time being we are free from stress and worries and we thought everything seems to be perfect. I guess its true that nothing is perfect in this world and life is boring without any problems. Let me start with a good news.. we were able to find a small tutorial playgroup for Corbin. See my blogpost under Corby's turf for more info. Last November, my hubby got an offer from an Oil and Gas company as Network Specialist. He applied for Desktop Support but was endorsed as Network Specialist. We're very happy about it because it all fits in.. the schedule is normal working hours he can regularly play guitar every sunday for Church, and the work is very challenging and somewhat what he really wanted plus its a new company thus more opportunity for growth. But it turned sour.. his boss is manipulative and very demanding, he's got alot of things he is expecting from Jun. During the interview he already set their expectation of

Its so hard to look for a cheap play school/playgroup day care center here in singapore. Its so expensive!! Lord please give us the best school for our son Corby..