When God says "No"
Just a few days ago I was raving about how happy I am with my family, feeling loved, feeling good. This morning, we received an answer to our much awaited application. We've been waiting for almost 4 months for the result of our application to obtain a residency in AU. And yes, we've applied family status, so when one fails, the entire family fails. It so happened that they thought our first son doesn't met the health qualification of the state/government. We tried to defend and submitted medico legal and waited 4months for the result, and we've got the dreaded "Visa Refusal" answer in our faces.
We've been praying about this application for such a long long time. We were very positive, since our intentions in applying is good and would benefit not just us, but our extended family as well, and its some sort of our way to start anew with our family life, just us, no debts, no financial burdens.
But God says "NO" in all caps. All our plans, dreams and future are shattered in just one email. I was disappointed, devastated, I cried inside the toilet since I was at work. I know my husband is very sad too. I wanted to hug him, he worked hard, we've made debts along the way for this.. but God said it is not His will... Why Lord? What's the reason? Is it because we've made mistakes? We sinned? We don't know why...
We just thought this would be the best for us.. this has been what we envision, what we thought was God's vision to us.. but then all of a suddeen it crushed our spirits.. How do you accept "No" for an answer? I've received tons of "Nos" from the Lord, but this one is the most painful because this is our planned escape that involves our family. Why not waiver? Why not give us a chance? We can go to Migration Tribunal but you know that costs a lot of money again, and money is our number one reason why we wanted to start anew, to pay our debts, to start from scratch without any "utang" any debt.. We want financial breakthrough, and singapore is too much expensive for us.. We want better benefits for our child, specially for Corbin, yet he's the reason they gave for us to get refused.
I know we cannot question God's intention, God's answers is the best, that's what they say. But what are we going to do now? We fear for our children, another one coming and we cannot take it anymore to succumb into more debts because we lack money and budget.
I guess I cannot be a full time mom as per God's answer... We didn't pass the test? Is that it? Its my fault? Is it because I lack alot of things? I cannot be entrusted? It's most definitely not Corbin's fault, he never wanted to be like that.. I am soo confused... I know we have to trust Him, despite of all these.. but it's hard.. it's painful to accept.. what are we going to do now?
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We've been praying about this application for such a long long time. We were very positive, since our intentions in applying is good and would benefit not just us, but our extended family as well, and its some sort of our way to start anew with our family life, just us, no debts, no financial burdens.
But God says "NO" in all caps. All our plans, dreams and future are shattered in just one email. I was disappointed, devastated, I cried inside the toilet since I was at work. I know my husband is very sad too. I wanted to hug him, he worked hard, we've made debts along the way for this.. but God said it is not His will... Why Lord? What's the reason? Is it because we've made mistakes? We sinned? We don't know why...
We just thought this would be the best for us.. this has been what we envision, what we thought was God's vision to us.. but then all of a suddeen it crushed our spirits.. How do you accept "No" for an answer? I've received tons of "Nos" from the Lord, but this one is the most painful because this is our planned escape that involves our family. Why not waiver? Why not give us a chance? We can go to Migration Tribunal but you know that costs a lot of money again, and money is our number one reason why we wanted to start anew, to pay our debts, to start from scratch without any "utang" any debt.. We want financial breakthrough, and singapore is too much expensive for us.. We want better benefits for our child, specially for Corbin, yet he's the reason they gave for us to get refused.
I know we cannot question God's intention, God's answers is the best, that's what they say. But what are we going to do now? We fear for our children, another one coming and we cannot take it anymore to succumb into more debts because we lack money and budget.
I guess I cannot be a full time mom as per God's answer... We didn't pass the test? Is that it? Its my fault? Is it because I lack alot of things? I cannot be entrusted? It's most definitely not Corbin's fault, he never wanted to be like that.. I am soo confused... I know we have to trust Him, despite of all these.. but it's hard.. it's painful to accept.. what are we going to do now?
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