typhoon just hit me...hard..
excerpts from my friendster blog dated march 6, 2007
Sometimes we do things we think is right.. but later on realizes that the outcome of our action could hurt the person we love the most.. our family...too bad we cannot turn back the time.. but I am still hoping that time would heal all wounds no matter how deep it may be..
I know I don't have the right to question God's purpose for me... I just cannot understand why He allows some things to happen … even though He knows my thoughts and heart's desire...I know it's the result of my weak decision.. if there is to blame that would only be me..
I am hurting right now.. it hurts to know that you are the reason why the person you love is experiencing too much pain. I've made plans and set some goals for my future but then something came up and it changes everything for me....some thing big... it hits me hard...that I almost fell on the ground..all the more I think about it the more it hurts me..
I love my family a whole lot.. I’ve made sacrifices for them…. I always make it a point to please them and do whatever I can to satisfy their needs. I love my parents. My mom and dad…. They’ve been living apart from each other for the longest time to be able to sustain the financial difficulties we are experiencing…. That is why as I mature and grow older I promise to myself that someday I will work hard so that my dad can stop working overseas and spent time with his wife… I still wanted that to happen soon...
An opportunity came… a great opportunity… it is one of my mom’s ultimate dream for me and my family…. And my future… I have accepted the opportunity for my mom… I know she’ll be happy about it. I’ve made some sacrifices, for me and my love one… I set the goal of accepting the career in Canada away from my one true love…
Afraid of the consequences of the distance... I've made a decision… a decision at first I thought was not really that of much of a problem… it turned out it was something big… but it does not stop from there. I tried hard to solve this problem and keep it to myself and my love one for the longest time…
But God knows the right time at the right place when something needs to be revealed… I was living in lies… full of lies and deception.. now I am living in truth.. it really is true that the truth will set you free.. it did set me free but it hurts… Truth hurts but the truth will set you free…
I know my mom is hurting right now.... she's not just hurt, but she's in excruciating pain because of me. I cannot blame her and I understand how she feels...she had great expectations of me.. I am the only person she can rely on since we are experiencing crisis in our family...we're down and out and I am the only precious gem that she's holding in her hand at this moment in time...I’m her only hope for survival. But I BETRAYED my mom.... she cannot accept the betrayal that happened.The wound is too deep that it hurts her so much… she cannot bear the pain....pain that leads to hatred...I know how much she hated me now... I know it may take months or even years before that wound heals... I am willing to wait...whatever it takes.
My plans did not work out just the way my mom wanted it to be…but it won't stop me from hoping that my mom and dad would be together soon.. i'll exhaust everything to be able to achieve that ultimate goal.I've experience being separated to the person I love and I know how much it hurts.
Sad to say you cannot turn back the hands of time… You cannot correct the mistakes you’ve once made in your life… you only learn from them… and as to what happened to me. I would say I’ve learned a lot… about love, life and keeping the faith… during this trying time that I realize the Lord will never leave you nor forsake you and that is so true. On my situation I can’t do anything but God can…so I prayed and still praying so hard that everything will turn out right.. with God’s will and not my will… I know the Lord has better plans for me than I have for myself… I just need to TRUST HIM..
Sometimes we do things we think is right.. but later on realizes that the outcome of our action could hurt the person we love the most.. our family...too bad we cannot turn back the time.. but I am still hoping that time would heal all wounds no matter how deep it may be..
I know I don't have the right to question God's purpose for me... I just cannot understand why He allows some things to happen … even though He knows my thoughts and heart's desire...I know it's the result of my weak decision.. if there is to blame that would only be me..
I am hurting right now.. it hurts to know that you are the reason why the person you love is experiencing too much pain. I've made plans and set some goals for my future but then something came up and it changes everything for me....some thing big... it hits me hard...that I almost fell on the ground..all the more I think about it the more it hurts me..
I love my family a whole lot.. I’ve made sacrifices for them…. I always make it a point to please them and do whatever I can to satisfy their needs. I love my parents. My mom and dad…. They’ve been living apart from each other for the longest time to be able to sustain the financial difficulties we are experiencing…. That is why as I mature and grow older I promise to myself that someday I will work hard so that my dad can stop working overseas and spent time with his wife… I still wanted that to happen soon...
An opportunity came… a great opportunity… it is one of my mom’s ultimate dream for me and my family…. And my future… I have accepted the opportunity for my mom… I know she’ll be happy about it. I’ve made some sacrifices, for me and my love one… I set the goal of accepting the career in Canada away from my one true love…
Afraid of the consequences of the distance... I've made a decision… a decision at first I thought was not really that of much of a problem… it turned out it was something big… but it does not stop from there. I tried hard to solve this problem and keep it to myself and my love one for the longest time…
But God knows the right time at the right place when something needs to be revealed… I was living in lies… full of lies and deception.. now I am living in truth.. it really is true that the truth will set you free.. it did set me free but it hurts… Truth hurts but the truth will set you free…
I know my mom is hurting right now.... she's not just hurt, but she's in excruciating pain because of me. I cannot blame her and I understand how she feels...she had great expectations of me.. I am the only person she can rely on since we are experiencing crisis in our family...we're down and out and I am the only precious gem that she's holding in her hand at this moment in time...I’m her only hope for survival. But I BETRAYED my mom.... she cannot accept the betrayal that happened.The wound is too deep that it hurts her so much… she cannot bear the pain....pain that leads to hatred...I know how much she hated me now... I know it may take months or even years before that wound heals... I am willing to wait...whatever it takes.
My plans did not work out just the way my mom wanted it to be…but it won't stop me from hoping that my mom and dad would be together soon.. i'll exhaust everything to be able to achieve that ultimate goal.I've experience being separated to the person I love and I know how much it hurts.
Sad to say you cannot turn back the hands of time… You cannot correct the mistakes you’ve once made in your life… you only learn from them… and as to what happened to me. I would say I’ve learned a lot… about love, life and keeping the faith… during this trying time that I realize the Lord will never leave you nor forsake you and that is so true. On my situation I can’t do anything but God can…so I prayed and still praying so hard that everything will turn out right.. with God’s will and not my will… I know the Lord has better plans for me than I have for myself… I just need to TRUST HIM..
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