It's been over a year... Blogger mode on!!!
Whoa.. I can't believe I haven't had time to blog the entire 2013!! heheheh Yes.. mommy duties and work and other activities, plus.. being pregnant again for the third time.
It was an unplanned pregnancy.. for 6 yrs calendar method never failed me.. Caleb( 2nd son) is a planned pregnancy so its not counted. But this new baby is not really planned, but it is God's plan.
I was not happy about the news at first since my 2nd son was just 9mos old when I got pregnant again. I suddenly became interested because everyone is saying it could be a girl. Which I was planning to have my third pregnancy at least 2-3 yrs after Caleb, but not my will but HIS will be done.
This 3rd pregnancy is different from the first, I can feel the morning sickness for the first 4 mos, and I am not that ugly and very minimal discoloration. So everyone thinks I am having a girl this time. I feel that way too.
5th month is my scheduled full scanned, was dismayed, shocked, devastated, sad.. about the result, being another boy is on the way. I feel that God did not answer our prayers.. I feel so annoyed. I event got less interested on this pregnancy for a few days. I know.. such a bad mom! This baby doesn't deserve any of this resenment.. he didn't choose his gender.. God did. I have tons of plans if I'll be having a girl, dressing up in pairs... putting nail polish on her as early as 4 yrs old... talking girly things and stuff. But all of those disappeared... that is why I was sooo devastated.. yes that is the term.
Growing up, I was an only girl and doesn't have sisters (thanks to my cousins whom I love) so I wanted to have a girl when I have my own family. But my thoughts are different from God's thoughts. I guess he has a plan for my third son that is why he became a boy. God is helping me out to accept this fact and accept the answer of his prayer is a No. I do not have plans of having another baby. Me and my husband wanted only 3 kids... with all our financial issues and nanny duties.. it's gonna be hard if its more than 3. Besides.. 3 is ideal for us. So I guess I have to bear being the only Queen in the family... since birth.. Good bye to the name Jianna ( the name I wanted if I got a girl). I guess it wouldn't be that bad.
Now I have to think of another name for a baby boy.
Well.. that's all I can say.. Lord give me the heart to accept your will and I know I have to submit because your plans are Better than mine!
It was an unplanned pregnancy.. for 6 yrs calendar method never failed me.. Caleb( 2nd son) is a planned pregnancy so its not counted. But this new baby is not really planned, but it is God's plan.
I was not happy about the news at first since my 2nd son was just 9mos old when I got pregnant again. I suddenly became interested because everyone is saying it could be a girl. Which I was planning to have my third pregnancy at least 2-3 yrs after Caleb, but not my will but HIS will be done.
This 3rd pregnancy is different from the first, I can feel the morning sickness for the first 4 mos, and I am not that ugly and very minimal discoloration. So everyone thinks I am having a girl this time. I feel that way too.
5th month is my scheduled full scanned, was dismayed, shocked, devastated, sad.. about the result, being another boy is on the way. I feel that God did not answer our prayers.. I feel so annoyed. I event got less interested on this pregnancy for a few days. I know.. such a bad mom! This baby doesn't deserve any of this resenment.. he didn't choose his gender.. God did. I have tons of plans if I'll be having a girl, dressing up in pairs... putting nail polish on her as early as 4 yrs old... talking girly things and stuff. But all of those disappeared... that is why I was sooo devastated.. yes that is the term.
Growing up, I was an only girl and doesn't have sisters (thanks to my cousins whom I love) so I wanted to have a girl when I have my own family. But my thoughts are different from God's thoughts. I guess he has a plan for my third son that is why he became a boy. God is helping me out to accept this fact and accept the answer of his prayer is a No. I do not have plans of having another baby. Me and my husband wanted only 3 kids... with all our financial issues and nanny duties.. it's gonna be hard if its more than 3. Besides.. 3 is ideal for us. So I guess I have to bear being the only Queen in the family... since birth.. Good bye to the name Jianna ( the name I wanted if I got a girl). I guess it wouldn't be that bad.
Now I have to think of another name for a baby boy.
Well.. that's all I can say.. Lord give me the heart to accept your will and I know I have to submit because your plans are Better than mine!
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